IMDB, The Zombie King“The Zombie King” on IMDB

Comedy/Horror – 2013 – 85 Minutes

This British offering walks a drunken, wobbling line between decent zom-com and failure. Embarrassingly, it’s the American “marquee” actors that drag it down the worst. Former child stars Edward Furlong [IMDB] and Corey Feldman [IMDB], both now schlock movie regulars, put in sad, heartless performances.  The first, as a distraught husband seeking to raise his wife from the dead, and the other as the voodoo god he bargains with to do it. Luckily both roles, although pivotal to the story, are marginalized and get very little screen time.

The rest of the movie is rather traditional. We follow a group of survivors as they struggle to stay alive and out of the jaws of a newly arisen zombie horde. There’s a foul-mouthed milk-man who quickly becomes expert at taking out zombies with his milk bottles. There’s a meter-maid-man who styles himself “the law” but more often than not ends up climbing a tree and cowering. They are all led by a hard-nosed mailman whose route across a hoodlum-infested estate has taught him a thing or two about survival.

They eventually meet up with other small groups to discover that the army has quarantined the area and is shooting anything that moves, dead or alive. They join forces to reach the relative safety of a nearby church. There a drunken priest, who is also an expert on Voodoo, explains the situation and provides them with a plan to stop the outbreak.

There are numerous gags and genre references, but unfortunately only about half of them land and only a select few land well. The jokes may be a little trite, but aren’t necessarily bad; the actors just have trouble pulling them off. Special effects are pretty much non-existent with much of the “action” taking place off-camera. Most damning, the “zombies” spend most of their time just looking annoyed.

In contrast, any scene with Furlong or Feldman is played completely straight. Definitely not better, just straight, making these these scenes feel out of place. It’s as if two completely different movies were accidentally edited together. Furlong barely acts at all, delivering all his lines as if he’s halfway through reading a driving manual. Feldman, on the other hand takes his role to ridiculous extremes.

All that sadly said, there is… something, here. A kind of quirky charm, perhaps, or maybe just sentimentality for something that could have been.

IMDB, Maggie“Maggie” on IMDB

Drama/Horror – 2015 – 95 Minutes

I think we can all agree that Arnold Schwarzenegger’s post-political film career has been somewhat… mundane. His several traditional, big-budget action movies have all been good; not great. More pointedly, none of them presented any real challenge or growth opportunities for the actor, although it’s difficult to fault a man in his late sixties for keeping inside his comfort zone; especially when he’s done so well in it. So, why would he choose to do a low-budget, independent drama – albeit one with a zombie twist?

Zombies remain popular, but still only rarely breakout to impact the mass market. Big name talent tends to avoid the genre and there have been only a few exceptions. (In fact, Abigail Breslin, playing the title character, is an alumnus of one them: 2009’s Zombieland.) Add to the mix that this is the first feature for director Henry Hobson and the first writing credit for writer John Scott 3 and  it becomes even less clear what attracted the king of action movies to the project.

What may be most confusing is that this may be Schwarzenegger’s best work to date.

The story, like many other post-peak zombie properties, mixes zombies into another genre – this time family drama. The backstory is told through inference and minimal flashbacks. The world is suffering from a zombie plague, but is still clinging to societal norms. There is no cure for the bitten and families are instructed to deliver them to quarantine centers before the change, which can take as long as several months, where they will be euthanized.

The never-seen centers are rumored to be over-populated, poorly managed and terrifying. The method of execution is revealed to be excruciatingly painful. When Wade’s (Schwarzenegger) daughter is bitten while on a trip he pulls some strings with his local doctor and is allowed to take her home to say goodbye. Maggie’s mother passed away years earlier and there is understandable tension with Wade’s new wife, but it never approaches the trite and lazy “wicked stepmother” vibe.

With very little change, the story could easily be that of a child dying of cancer or any degenerative disease. The zombie angle is leveraged well, but lightly and there is little to no “action” in the piece. It’s a somber exploration of a father’s devotion to his dying daughter and her ultimate acceptance of an inescapable fate. Tension is drawn out expertly from many sources, but always from human interaction and expectation.

As Maggie’s condition degrades Wade is put under pressure from multiple sources to take her to the centers or to handle the issue himself. Schwarzenegger’s performance is nuanced and surprisingly subtle as we agonize with him on the best course of action. There are still wooden moments, but the performance remains his best in decades; perhaps ever. Breslin matches him well, wavering between bravely facing her fate for her family and being naturally terrified of it. Her performance is enhanced greatly by the effective, but subtle, practical make-up effects that mark her transformation.

Unfortunately its unlikely that the movie will attract a larger audience. It’s likely be considered too slow and plodding for most genre fans and too steeped in the genre for fans of mainstream drama. The quiet, introspective story asks a lot, perhaps too much, of its audience. Those willing to put in the effort will enjoy the amazing performances and a deeply human experience.

IMDB, Dead Snow Red vs Dead“Dead Snow 2: Red vs. Dead” on IMDB

Horror – 2014 – 100 Minutes

The original Dead Snow, released in 2009, was one of the first movies we screened as part of the very first Boiled Eggs and Brain Eaters. In a classic set-up, a group of young friends take a beer-fueled trip into the mountains for some fun in the snow. Unfortunately, once they get there, they raise an army of pissed-off undead nazis. It became an instant household favorite, but it did have a bit of an identity crisis.

The movie begins as a straight, effective horror movie. Perhaps poking a little fun at itself via deftly applied genre cliche, but a straight take nonetheless. There’s enough jump scares, gore and bad decisions to satisfy any horror fan. That all changed in the last act. At that point the movie just goes amazingly, awesomely, absolutely insane. A darkly hilarious “gearing up” montage plays homage to “The Evil Dead” and prepares the audience for a pants-crapping crazy melee between the survivors and the Nazi dead.

The whole sequence launched the movie into a completely different class. The stark white, sun-soaked snow made for an amazing canvas for the splattering of blood and the splaying of severed limbs. The desperation of the survivors juxtaposed with the ridiculousness of the premise created one of the most darkly hilarious scenes in modern horror.

The sequel took everything that worked in that third act and cranked it straight to eleven.

It begins the moment the first film ended and continues the story of our sole survivor, Martin. He still has problems. The police have dismissed his explanation and are holding him responsible for the deaths of his friends. The Nazi zombies, led by the demonic Colonel Herzog, have decided to complete their original mission: march on and destroy a town that was a hotbed of the Norwegian resistance. Along the way he begins raising an army of the undead from his victims.

Through a ridiculous, but hilarious, circumstance Martin is now tied to the Colonel and shares some of his power. He’s the only one with any hope of stopping Herzog. He gains allies as the story progresses, including the “Zombie Squad”, a team of American zombie fans that have never seen a zombie but are absolutely positive that they exist. They’re not what you’d call “effective”, but they do have a hell of a lot of gumption.

The movie is gut-bustingly hilarious and unabashedly dark as hell. You will laugh your ass off and you will feel completely guilty for doing it. For all that, there’s not a mean bone in this movie’s shuffling, reanimated body. It’s bigger, more bombastic and more irreverent than the first in every way. It’s also gorgeously produced and artfully paced. This is the new standard for zombie party movies.

IMDB, Zombie Hunter“Zombie Hunter” on IMDB

Horror – 2013 – 93 Minutes

This film was a selection for BEBE 2015.

There were only two reasons too watch this: 1) it has the word “zombie” in the title and 2) it has the words “Danny Trejo” above the title. Now having “zombie” in the title isn’t exactly a hallmark of excellence. If anything, it’s generally a sign of amateurishness. “Danny Trejo” doesn’t really scream “quality” either, but does mean that you’ll at least see some Danny Trejo.

Turns out, not all that much in this case. Even though he’s plastered all over the poster, Trejo really only gets a couple of scenes. One of those scenes is so overladen with aggressively terrible CGI that you can barely see him. Everything else is dull and lifeless and wastes him completely.

The rest of the movie is a lumpy mash of genres and themes. Set years after a zombie outbreak, a terrible “Mad Max” clone drives through the wasteland killing the animate dead and recording ham-fisted narration. He’s ambushed by a group of survivors and his car is totalled, forcing him to squint and grunt a lot. The group, made up of Trejo, a couple rednecks, a pole dancer, a hollywood-plain (meaning smoking hot) girl and a late-twenty something guy playing a teenager have apparently only survived until this point because the camera wasn’t pointed at them.

Zombies attack their total lack of fortifications and, surprisingly, break through.  Then the aforementioned terrible CGI zombies attack and the group is forced to flee. They do this so well they make it all the way out of their movie and into the equally bad slasher movie. After spending some very predictable time in the slasher movie, the zombies catch up with them and other things happen.

By this point, nobody cared. Our advice, if you’re stuck with this: fast forward to Trejo, then stop it after he leaves. It still won’t be a good movie, but at least Trejo is never dull.

IMDB, Dead Season“Dead Season” on IMDB

Horror – 2012 – 85 Minutes

This film was a selection for BEBE 2015.

One of the casualties of the zombie popularity explosion is the traditional zombie movie. They’re still out there, as this proves, but they’ve been shoved aside by a cavalcade of “zombie vs. things”, rarely funny zom-coms, direct to television schlock and a much smaller, but forceful, selection of high-concept zombie flicks. Simple, serious stories about survivors in a world of the dead just don’t seem to be in demand any longer.

Doing a good movie is never easy, but doing a decent, traditional zombie movie is absolutely easier than the alternatives. Comedy is hard; very hard. High concept is great when it works but pathetic when it fails (and it fails a lot). A good, old-fashioned zombie story? We all know know them and we all like them.

The story starts long after the dead have brought humanity to the brink. Elvis (played by Scott Peat [IMDB]) has become a professional survivor. He’s turned his focus to looking for other survivors. Tweeter (Marissa Merrill [IMDB]) and the boy she’s protecting find him and form an uneasy alliance. When food becomes scarce they take a long-shot: a boat to the supposed sanctuary of a Caribbean island. There, a small community struggles to survive both the dead and challenges that the island sets them.

The opening scenes are the strongest. In many ways they’re more thought provoking than the effective, but predictable twist later. We’re introduced to Elvis and his past and we  follow him as he wanders the ruins, scavenging. Small details are given significant thought and the care taken to introduce the world is obvious. The sequence is quiet and soulful and it sets the tone very well.

Technically the movie suffers for its budget, but not as badly as many. Simple, practical effects are used throughout and work well. Even poor practical effects beat crappy CGI, hands down. There’s also some impressive audio work, considering the budget. The action sequences are the weakest element, overall, with fast cuts and jittery camera work standing-in for choreography. Thankfully, the script doesn’t allow the relatively few action scenes to become a focus making their quality something of a moot point.

The script is smart and, as noted, a little predictable. Predictability is vastly preferable to the muddled mess that most movies create by trying to surprise the audience. Here, with a few unfortunate exceptions, people act reasonably and intelligently. Predictability is a small price to pay. Acting is hit-or-miss across the board, but the main characters, at least, are well handled.

The movie has flaws – the lack of budget sees to that – but it overcomes them to deliver a solid, traditional story. Good, old-fashioned zombie stories have become rare; this is a good, old-fashioned zombie story.

IMDB, The Jones

“The Jones” on IMDB

Horror – 2015 – 9 Minutes

Force of Nature Films has finished the second segment of their horror anthology, “The Forces of Horror Anthology Series Volume I”. The first segment, “Revelations“, was reviewed on our sister site,, but this one is a Zombie story and belongs here.

[Full disclosure: this review was the result of a request from the writer/director of the movie.]

It is worth reading that first review as nearly everything applies to this segment as well. This is still a rock-bottom budget production. It’s still got the same problems that a rock-bottom budget brings. And, like the first, it ends up much better than you’d expect.

Don’t take our word for it, you can watch it right now:

Technically there are subtle, but noticeable, improvements over the first segment. Firstly, although the cast is still very small, there are more characters to work with and this allows for a more dynamic presentation. The effects are limited, but are all practical and effective. The acting is uneven, but definitely not as poor as the budget would normally attract. Camera work, staging and transitions are kept smartly simple. They may not be exciting, but they work well and opportunities for embarrassment are all but eliminated.

It’s a simpler story than the first, and more approachable. Like any good short, it features a concise, complete story arc that introduces an interesting idea, then ends with you wanting more. The idea isn’t particularly mind-blowing, but it is novel and, to our knowledge, original. It’s an idea worth mulling over a bit after watching. It reminded us – and this isn’t said lightly – of a classic “Twilight Zone” episode. Sure, maybe not the best Twilight Zone episode, but honestly: there were no bad ‘Zones!

This is a definite improvement over an already impressive start. The team is clearly not rushing themselves on these and the care they’re taking shows. We’re excited to see more and thank the team for sharing them with us.

IMDB, The JonesWe have a nice surprise: just last night, Roger Sampson of Force of Nature Films sent us a note that he had finished the second segment of his horror anthology, “The Forces of Horror Anthology Series Volume I” and it’s a zombie story! Talk about synergy!

Where the first segment was a serious, otherworldly reversal of expectations, this one, “The Jones” is a tongue-in-cheek take on the zombie genre. Here we meet the Jones, an average, normal family of zombies just not-living life just like everybody else. They have a small problem: their daughter’s not feeling well. She’s lost her taste for brains and her fever is well above room-temperature. What’s a pair of loving zombie parents to do?

Like the first segment of the anthology, “Revelations“, which we reviewed on our sister site,, this is a no-budget production that exceeds expectations. Each short presents a single interesting concept, “Twilight Zone” style, and gives us just a taste of it.

Here’s the trailer for “The Jones” and we highly recommend that you track it down when it’s released:

IMDB, Life After Beth“Life After Beth” on IMDB

Comedy/Horror – 2014 – 89 Minutes

At this stage in the game any attempt at originality in the zombie genre gets points. Real originality, of course. Plopping zombies in a new location – a tanning salon! a brokerage firm! a library! – doesn’t cut it. You need to try harder than that. This does.

Beth (Aubrey Plaza [IMDB] playing herself, as usual) is dead. Her boyfriend Zach (Dane DeHaan [IMDB]) is shattered. That is, at least, until he drops by to visit her parents and finds her wandering around the house. Other than being a little muddled, her funeral doesn’t seem to have slowed her down much. Her parents think it’s a miracle. He’s not going to argue; especially since she can’t seem to remember that she had dumped him the day she died.

She’s also decided that she’s most comfortable in the attic and loves smooth jazz. She doesn’t seem to feel pain, has freakish strength and violent mood swings. Zach tries to take things in stride, but it’s difficult to pretend that this is the same Beth he knew and loved. It’s also difficult to ignore that there’s something odd going on in general when other previously deceased people start popping up. As Beth, and the situation in general, degrade further, it becomes impossible.

The conceit is undeniably interesting: zombies are the reanimated recent dead but, at least for a little while, they’re basically themselves. They have some memory lapses and minor quirks, but aren’t something to be automatically feared. Once the rot and the hunger sets in they get more… “traditional”, but until then they may very well be considered a blessing.

The idea is original (at least as far as I know) and executed well, but the overall story has a slow unevenness that undermines it. It meanders through multiple genres without committing enough to any of them. The audience is unable to find comfortable footing and, in turn, means that many of the gags and emotional touch points fall flat.

Even if it’s just not enough of a horror movie… or a comedy… or a romance… to truly stand out, there’s still a lot to like. The A-list cast (or, maybe, “A minus” list) is excellent and do the best with what they have. A good budget goes a long way in a landscape of no-budget mediocrity. The ideas are fun and implemented with a minimum of cliche. It may sputter out at the end, but at least you passed some interesting scenery on the trip.

IMDB, Severed“Severed” on IMDB

Horror – 2005 – 93 Minutes

This wavered wildly between inspired and insipid letting it land squarely in the mediocre middle. It seems to have fallen victim to a common problem in this space: barely enough money to make a movie, but enough ideas for three.

The setting is a remote logging camp and mill, run by a giant, profit-hungry corporation. The infection is the result of this company playing around with the equivalent of tree steroids. The injections make the trees grow significantly faster, but apparently also cause minor, prolonged cases of zombism in the loggers and environmental activists that populate this little corner of the Pacific-Northwest.

This leads us to our first minor issue: there seem to be a lot of zombies running around here. We only ever see a handful of people at first, but later seem to have a endless supply of zombies. The infection’s actual path of transmission is vague at best, but it’s made clear that the area is remote and unpopulated; so where are all these people coming from? Why are they spread out all over the place?

The zombies themselves are confusing as well. They appear to be hyper-aggressive, infected a la “28 Days Later”, yet we’re told “you have to hit them in the head,” for some reason. Granted, this is said only once and never seems to matter again, but it is said. The infection is, of course, transmittable via bite and this has the same problem as many other zombie properties: if the zombies eat and dismember their prey, how does the infection spread so well? With the lack of warm bodies here, this seems to be a much more important question.

The major issue comes into play about halfway in, when our group makes it way to another camp. Up until this point we were enjoying a decent, but fairly standard, “small group tries to stay alive” story. They ran from zombies, struck back with crowbars and sticks and tried to find a way to escape or call for help. But this new group – and we have to remember that this outbreak is, it seems, not more than a few days old – seems to have already gone full “Lord of the Flies”.

We switch gears completely with only a portion of our run time left. The new camp is controlled by a sadistic leader who rules with an iron fist. They exploit the infected for a dangerous bloodsport. They live in the warped shadow of a civilization that they’ve forgotten. I mean, it’s been, like, over a week since the outbreak started – what else do you expect them to do?! You get the sense that these guys have given up civilization a lot. That one time the the toilet got plugged up or when “Friends” was cancelled, for example.

This segment is interesting, but confusing, incongruous and curtailed. It’s a shame because, had this aspect been introduced sooner and some minor timeline changes made, this could have been a solid exploration of human fragility in the face of disaster. Instead it flits, fickle, from theme to theme never settling on one long enough for the audience to sink in their teeth.

IMDB, Mimesis“Mimesis” on IMDB

Horror – 2011 – 95 Minutes

You’d think that a zombie movie with no zombies wouldn’t be very good. I mean, that’s the whole point, right: zombies? You’d be wrong. It’s a bumpy road, but this is definitely a rarity: a clever, smart low-budget horror movie. They should have changed the name tho’: needing to bring a scene to a screeching halt just to have somebody explain the meaning of your title is a big, bloody red flag. Even if the name fits, if nobody other than literature majors knows what it means: change it.

Of course, in this case, it doesn’t fit. Although “Mimesis” has grown to have many meanings in the past couple of thousand years, it most often refers to “art imitating life”. The opposite, “life imitating art” is anti-mimesis. This movie is about the latter, but they call it the former. So not only is the name pretentious, it’s wrong. But the movie’s still good.

A diverse group of horror fans is approached at a convention and invited to an exclusive party at a remote farmhouse. As the party winds down, they’re drugged and wake up in the morning dressed in vintage clothes and unable to remember how they got there. Two are lying in a cemetery, five are locked in the basement of the farmhouse and one is passed out in a pickup truck. The two in the cemetery are attacked by what looks like a zombie and one of them has his throat ripped out.

When they take shelter in the farm house and finally meet, it becomes clear that somebody is trying very hard to recreate George Romero’s classic, “Night of the Living Dead”. Each person is accounted for: Barbara, the middle aged husband and wife with their little girl, the teenage lovers and, of course, the black guy. If that wasn’t enough for horror fans to piece things together, they also find the movie playing on a loop in one of the rooms.

Most of the actual action is fairly standard slasher fair. Dark rooms, shaky hands, improvised weapons and lots of gore. Setting it all against the backdrop of an insane recreation of a horror movie makes it seem fresher and more inventive than it likely deserves to be, but what can I say? It works. The gore is well done using classic, tried and true practical effects and reminds you of how far digital effects still have to come. If you need to stab somebody in the face with a pitchfork, practical effects are absolutely the way to do it right.

As you might expect, things do start to break down at the end, but not so much that the premise wears out its welcome. My only real complaint is that the movie had two more endings that it should have had – the final sequence lacks all of the finesse and focus of the main film. It’s not enough to ruin things, but it does leave a bad taste in your mouth.

There are more nits to be picked, of course . You may complain that the clever premise is hiding a mediocre movie, but isn’t that a success rather than a failure? At this budget level you can’t win on visual effects, or acting or even writing. You can win, and sometimes even win big enough to overshadow all your other problems, with a clever premise and a focused execution. Horror is 99% mental: you can make an easy movie with bare boobs and buckets of blood, but unless you give the brain something to chew on, you’re going to fail. This movie provides your ravenous brain with something nice and bloody to sink its teeth into.