Fallout 4_20151212014946We’ve been playing Fallout 4 on the PlayStation 4 since its release on November 10th (you can follow our playthrough diary at our sister site, DepressedPress.com). We continue to celebrate our favorite ghouls of the game.

This week, we bring you Arlen Glass, an absolute sweetheart. Arlen is the handyman at The Slog, the all Ghoul farm that you’ll likely run into fairly early in the game. You’ll learn later than Arlen was the lead toy designer at Atomatoys and head of the “Giddyup Buttercup” line of robot hobby horses.

He left the company when his superiors accepted military contracts and, shortly thereafter, was turned into a ghoul in the nuclear holocaust. One of the most poignant moments in the game comes when you bring Arlen a 200 year-old holotape allowing him to hear the voices of his lost wife and daughter.

Here’s to you, Arlen, making an old, fat gamer cry.

This is the 149th Zombie of the Week; that’s nearly three years of zombies! We are desperately running out of ideas! Please contact us with suggestions!

IMDB, Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse“Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse” on IMDB

Horror/Comedy – 2015 – 93 Minutes

We must admit, despite all sense, we were actually excited for this movie when it was announced. The premise was promising: how would a troop of scouts – and be clear: not trademarked and copyright protected “Boy Scouts“, just “scouts” – handle the zombie apocalypse? How would these legendarily prepared youths fare against the truly unexpected?

We never find out. The “troop” in this film is made up exactly three kids, all in their late teens. The characters are poster-board thin and they fall into their slots easily and without complaint. We have the everyman, Ben (Tye Sheridan), who pines for a girl, makes the best peace among his friends and always does the right thing. We have the fool, Carter (Logan Miller), who’s more interested in sex than woodcraft and screams every damn line. Both of them are still in scouts to spare the feelings of Augie (Joey Morgan), the overweight doofus, who hides untapped strength under his lovable naivete.

They have planned their last camping trip together to coincide both with the massive, but secret, senior rave that Carter and Ben are desperate to attend and the zombie plague that an inept janitor releases in a horrifically unfunny, drawn out sequence. When they discover the zombie problem, they join forces with Denise (Sarah Dumont), a cocktail waitress at the strip club that Carter insists they seek shelter in. Together, the group becomes determined to discover the location of the rave and warn their classmates.

The movie does as little as possible with its main premise. Ben whittles a spear at one point and Augie, in a cliche-ridden climax, redeems himself by starting a fire. The rest is a trite teen romp lightly drizzled in blood. It was promising to see a rated “R” zombie movie, for once, but it resulted in was gratuitous zombie nudity and an extended, graphic dick joke that stopped being funny long before it ended.

Furthermore, the movie commits the sin of pretending that having a single “strong” female character means its not sexist as hell. It is. Denise is a strong woman, and Dumont’s performance is as good as the material will allow. She also spends the entire film in a tank top and short-shorts and is forced to do and say ridiculous things in service of a half-assed frat mentality. The few other female characters are there to be nude or, at best, rescued.

The movie wasted, then ignored, its premise and its rating. There were a few – very few – laughs, but the few that worked initially were driven so heavily into the ground that they were ruined long before any kind of mood could be set. Zombie comedies are far from rare; you can and should avoid this one easily.

Fallout 4_20151210170502We’ve been playing Fallout 4 on the PlayStation 4 since its release on November 10th (you can follow our playthrough diary at our sister site, DepressedPress.com). We celebrated its new, more aggressive ghouls a few days later on November 15th. But what about the many interesting ghouls that don’t want to immediately chew your face off? This series is for them!

Minor spoilers ahead!

Bobbi No-nose (an odd name as none of the ghouls have noses) is an abrasive, joyless schemer who lies often and loudly. She’s truly a terrible person that drags you into an amazingly impracticable plot that almost gets you killed. On the plus side… there is no plus side.

This is the 148th Zombie of the Week; that’s nearly three years of zombies! We are desperately running out of ideas! Please contact us with suggestions!

Fallout 4_20151127230241We’ve been playing Fallout 4 on the PlayStation 4 since its release on November 10th (you can follow our playthrough diary at our sister site, DepressedPress.com). We celebrated its new, more aggressive ghouls a few days later on November 15th. But what about the many interesting ghouls that don’t want to immediately chew your face off? This series is for them!

Minor spoilers ahead!

First up, meet your friendly neighborhood Vault-Tec rep. He’s one of the first characters you meet in 2077 and it’s a good thing: moments after he signs you and your family up for the local vault nuclear hell breaks out. You make it to the vault just in time to see this dedicated company man get refused entry.

200 years later – years that you spent blissfully unaware in cryogenic suspension – you’ll come across the poor sap all miserable and ghoulified. He’s a little hostile and depressing at first, but if you’re patient you can offer him a job as a salesman in one of your settlements. This will perk him up tremendously.

This is the 147th Zombie of the Week; that’s nearly three years of zombies! We are desperately running out of ideas! Please contact us with suggestions!

Matt Frewer, Dawn of the DeadThe 2004 remake of Dawn of the Dead was better than most would have anticipated. It even gave the 1978 original a run for its money at times. We’ve previously celebrated Andre and Luda’s biting baby bundle, and this time want to focus on a smaller, but nonetheless impactful character: Frank.

The survivors in the mall have their first real test of conscience as a truck approaches, hounded by the dead. Although it’s not unanimous, they decide to help and allow the new group into the mall. Among them are Frank (Matt Frewer) and his daughter Nicole (Lindy Booth). Frank’s been bit. His last minutes of life with his daughter are the most emotional of the film. Then he turns and gets shot in the face.

We’re huge fans of Frewer and feel that he’s never achieved the success he deserved. He brings a meaningful sincerity to every role, no matter how small and, it so happens, just recently celebrated his 58th birthday! Here’s to you, Mr. Frewer!

This is the 146th Zombie of the Week; that’s nearly three years of zombies! We are desperately running out of ideas! Please contact us with suggestions!

Bill Murray, ZombielandWe celebrated the lovely (at least for a few minutes) 406 from Zombieland way back in May of 2013, but somehow never returned to celebrate the true zombie star of the movie: Bill Murray! The more pedantic among you might argue: “But he wasn’t really a zombie; he was just pretending to be one!” The more pedantic among you can sit down and help yourselves to a big glass of shut-the-hell-up.

Murray may not have survived Columbus, but he’ll (pretend to) not-live forever in our hearts.

This is the 145th Zombie of the Week; that’s nearly three years of zombies! We are desperately running out of ideas! Please contact us with suggestions!

 

Zombie BubNot sure how we’ve missed this one for so long! George Romero’s third movie in the “Dead” series, Day of the Dead, features the lovable (kinda) zombie Bub.

In the movie the insane Doctor Logan, working in a military facility, experiments with Bub. He teaches him how to listen to music, shave and – for reasons – how to handle and fire automatic weapons. He even teaches Bub to talk… well, mimic… sorta. He also feeds him pieces of people. Dead ones, but still: he feeds him people.

In the huge, unexpected, out-of-nowhere-at-all surprise ending Bub escapes and uses automatic weapons! Bub, here’s to you, buddy!

This is the 144th Zombie of the Week; that’s nearly three years of zombies! We are desperately running out of ideas! Please contact us with suggestions!